I always have a good cry whenever traumatic or bad things happen.  It doesn’t always happen right away either.  It could be a week or weeks later.  Yeah.  I had that today in the doctor’s office.  One of the many doctors I see.  Only I got interrupted.  So I was thinking I may pick it back up again.  Bwahahahah!

I saw the hematologist today.  I didn’t want to.  I figured she would be upset that the filter didn’t come out.  I was right.  As in…she wants me to go back in again, to a different doc, and have that horrible, awful, no-good, very bad procedure done to me…again!  Did I say ‘again’ enough???

Do you ever get the feeling that life is being dictated to you rather than the other way around?  I’ve felt that way before.  I don’t like it much.  I especially don’t like it when it concerns my health and I’ve got all these docs that I’ve got to coordinate with…of course THEY won’t coordinate with each other…and get them all on the same page.  Which they NEVER are.  And I’m no medical expert.  Especially about this.  When they all say different things, it certainly doesn’t help.

If you ask me why I have to have the filter out…I guess the reasoning is because having a foreign body inside isn’t the best thing plus I will have to be on blood thinners for life if it stays in.  As it was put to me, “You don’t want that do you?”  Heh.

Meanwhile I was looking up information about IVC filters and found some good pictures.  Here’s basically what it looks like…

Here’s a medical article about it.  I don’t like medical articles much but it was interesting to me cause it was all about what’s inside me!  Anyway…there are some great photos in the article here.  There’s one of what it looks like inside your body. ;D

Ok.  That’s all I have to say at the moment.  I think more of my life took over and I can’t go and have the rest of that good cry.  Too many people need me and too many dang things to do.

Meanwhile…I have done a couple of layouts.  Both speed scraps.  I don’t know if I am in love with the speed scrap concept itself…but I sure find myself doing a lot of them recently! ;D

Layout credits.

Layout credits.

So I was thinking of describing my hospital experience that way.  Oh and yes I know I said I wasn’t going to post until next week.  But I’m sitting here with nothing to do.  I haven’t slept in 2 days and using my computer is the only comforting thing right now.  Well maybe not comforting…but it takes my mind off pain and lack of sleep.  So here’s my list…not my bucket list…bwahahahah!  Just a warning…if this has typos in it…I haven’t slept in two days.  Night one…worrying about the procedure.  Night two…pain from said procedure.  Ugh!

1.  I got all checked in just fine.  But…they didn’t know what my INR levels were and they wouldn’t do the “surgery” unless they knew so we had to wait for my blood work.  That backed things up a bit.

2.  When the doc got in, there were no clots in the filter but some of the “legs” of the filter had turned up instead of facing down so he had to turn them around.

3.  When he tried to pull it out it wouldn’t come out.  It hurt like HELL!  It had adhered to the wall of my vein…as they often do if you leave them in too long.

4.  He worked on me for over 3 hours.  This is a procedure that “typically” takes 1/2 and hour.  I was awake for all of it except one short part at the end.  They sedated me at the end because it was just getting to be so much.  They had to give me A LOOOOOOOOOOOT of pain meds.  Yes.  It sucked!

5.  As you may know they go in thru my neck to get this thing out.  Well.  He ALSO had to go up thru my groin because he put a balloon up under it to try to dislodge it.  So I had two catheters in me.  Yes it was awful.  I repeat.  Awful.

6.  I was in a ton of pain.  Did I mention that?  If I didn’t (he he) then I am again.  I still am.

7.  I am alive.  Yahoo!  I would insert dancing but I can’t exactly do that right now.

8.  They had to leave the filter in there AFTER all that…and it will stay in me for life.  The surgeon is not going to try to get it out a second time.  So after all that pain and suffering…it is still in there.  Peh!

9.  Where do I go from here?  If my genetic tests come back negative then hopefully I’ll get off coumadin in a few more months.  Leaving the filter in has some risks but trying to get it out has more risks I guess…so it stays.  Hopefully this will all soon be but a happy memory. 

10.  Maybe I’ll sleep tonight.  Maybe I won’t.  But if I don’t get some sleep soon heads will roll!  If you ask Corey…they already are!

I think that’s all I want to share.  Or all that I should.  Given my lack of sleep.

Since I don’t usually like to post without photos…here are a couple from the beach the other day. ;D

I got a new job at My Life and Scrap.  So I am now a designer at two places.  I’m working my tail off to get my new products together so I can open my store at MLAS.  My nice fancy computer Corey got me…so I could be a “real” designer and work in a “real” office…the motherboard died.  THEN he gave me a replacement that was, bless his heart, slower than death.  So I went back to my laptop and was working across the network.  THAT was even slower.  So he went to get my data off my brand new hard drive and the case that he put it in blew it up.  He went to see if it (the hard drive) really was dead and put it in the slower than death puter…and it blew the mother board in that one.  So I am computer-less…except for my trusty…knock on wood…laptop.

So now Corey’s in data recovery mode.  Trying to get all my data back.  Yikes.

So I’m trying not to stress.  And trying to work.  I ALSO am going to be guest CT at ScrapArtist in Aug.  I also have 3 speed scraps and a challenge I’m hosting at DSM.

Oh and btw…did I mention that I have to have my renal filter out on Friday?  The one they put in April to stop the blood clots from reaching my heart?  So I have to stop coumadin, start lovenox (yeah those pleasant shots) and go in for that…supposed to be an outpatient procedure…but when they put a catheter down your neck…it kinda hurts for a few days!  Also they say if there is a blood clot in it (the filter) then it has to stay in there for life…which has its own issues.

Yeah.  It just doesn’t stop around here.

So I don’t have access to any pretty pictures to show you…or any previews to any new products…or my challenge at DSM or the Freebie you can get if you do the speed scrap on Aug 2.  Sorry folks.

But I wanted to let you know I hadn’t fallen off the face of the earth…just yet! ;D

The other evening Corey and the kids went outside to play catch in the front yard.  We have a window seat in the formal living room that the dogs like to perch in and watch the goings-on in the front yard.  I found the dogs perched there watching.  I grabbed my camera to capture it.  As soon as I returned Baxter ran away.  Skits turned and literally “posed”.  Here he is…

Second.  We made our debut at the pool this season yesterday.  It wasn’t the warmest of days…but we were tired of the constant nagging from the girls.  So we went. ;D  Our new pool has a diving board and two slides!  What fun!

I suggested taking a walk with the doggies.  Poor guys…they haven’t gone on a walk since I got sick.  Would you believe that everyone in my family was complaining about going…EXCEPT me! ;D  Now that is a switch.  We took the dogs to the dog park since it is such a favorite place and since they can run off leash and just go and go.

I have not been able to take a walk in some time without getting winded.  Corey and I have been discussing my recent medical problems and we think they go back as far as last October.  He remembers me not being able to even hike short distances without getting completely winded.  A little scary to think about…

But last night was wonderful.  The weather is really starting to shape up around here.  I was able to keep up for the most part…and besides my back hurting…which is another issue entirely…I had a blast.  Man does it feel good to be on the mend!!!! ;D  Thank you Lord!

See…Laney’s even got her Broncos shirt on!  With an expression that says, “Bad throw!” ;D

Which then turned into yard work…

I also have a new product in the store.  It is a doodle pack called Little Sweeties.

I hope you have a GREAT Monday!

Ava has got an attitude the size of…a teenager…and she’s 9.

The house is a mess.

I’m still in pain.

I’m not getting much sleep at night.

AND I’M SO THANKFUL TO BE ALIVE. Seriously.  I am.

Corey sent me this news story yesterday.  Again.  I was hit with a wave of death awareness.  And thankfulness.

I was able to go to Ava’s school on Friday and see her “Wax Museum”.  The kids have been studying people in history.  Ava was Amelia Earhart.  Each child had to “be in character” for the museum.  It was very, very cute.  It tired me out beyond belief.  I was not feeling well by the end of it.  We didn’t stay long.  But I thank God I was able to go.  It meant the world to her!